So, here I am in the countdown back to work after nearly two years on maternity leave with my little boy. It's quite a stressful time as we are moving interstate and moving really sucks! I'm securing my spot in day care centre near our new house, which makes me feel a bit better as we will be able to walk him to drop off and pick up rather than drive - taking a bit of the logistal nightmare element out of the equation.
I feel like I need to enjoy this time, like really enjoy it as I can feel the days/hours/minutes slipping away. Even though it's tough being a stay-at-home parent, it's also really nice to hang out all day with a small person you like quite a lot.
So the days are drawing to a close and I'm freaking out. I've always been a bit like this though, I remember a few years ago I got really stressed on the last week of our holiday - because we only had a week left of our holiday! Dumb huh.
The feeling I have right now is a little bit like that. Often I have a lot of time to internalise and overthink stuff, as while he naps or I'm pushing his to the park in the pram it's just me and my eleventy billion thoughts.
I am very lucky to have had this time, thanks to an awesome employer and even more wonderful partner. The reality for many mums and dads is having to go back to full-time or part-time work before their baby has turned one. I feel lucky, but I also feel sad it's almost over.
It's not been a dream, it's not all been smooth sailing, there have been days where I just lost my shit and cried. One time I flipped out after I missed the bus, meaning I'd be late to storytime at the library. I spent the next hour walking the streets wailing and bemoaning my life to an infant. That was one of the shitter times in the 'dream' period of my stay-at-home mum life.
As any new parent will know kids are exhausting. They get sick, they don't eat their vegetables, they cry because we can''t watch the digger down the street for another 45 minutes. But, they are also great - hours spent in the yard playing with sand, talking to the dog, eating sandwiches on a picnic blanket in the sun, cuddles and all that warm fuzzy stuff.
As any new parent will know kids are exhausting. They get sick, they don't eat their vegetables, they cry because we can''t watch the digger down the street for another 45 minutes. But, they are also great - hours spent in the yard playing with sand, talking to the dog, eating sandwiches on a picnic blanket in the sun, cuddles and all that warm fuzzy stuff.
I just hope I look back on this time I've had and remember all the good feels, and a little bit of me hopes he remembers some of it too.
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